When the pilgrims went to America, they took cows with them. Even to this day your steak will cost more if it came from a cow descended from those which came over on the Mayflower.
Every day a cow will spend up to 6 hours eating and 8 hours chewing the cud, this is why you don't see them at the local ice-rink, they just don't have time.
Cows stand up and lie down about 14 times a day, they are also good at press-ups and star-jumps.
Cows can detect odours up to 5 miles away, which is why you don't find them in your son's bedroom.
A Hereford bull gives all it's offspring the characteristic and and unique white face. If a cow's face is blue, then it is an Aberdeen Angus, painted in Woad, invading across the border. Hadrian's wall was built to stop this from happening...
Cows drink a bath-tub full of water each day, however they are not keen on bubble-bath, or those little rubber ducks.
Cows can see in colour, so when you next take a walk in the countryside, please ensure that your clothing is colour co-ordinated.